Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize