Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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