I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
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