i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
