Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
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