just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
So there we are, fucking beneath the Christmas tree and I glance up and see one of the local Jehovah's witnesses staring in horror through the decorative glass in the front door. I'm so proud of us.
Randomize
