I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Randomize