well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
