If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
