Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
