The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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