Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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