my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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