Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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