for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
