no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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