i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
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