No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize