come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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