Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
