I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
