i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
