South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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