omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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