...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
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