I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Your penis caused this!
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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