D3 body, D1 cock
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
All I want is dick and wine.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
