So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize
