Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
