I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
