yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
