i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
she pinky promised me she was 18
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
I will be naked everywhere
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Randomize