I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
