yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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