We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize