Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
