You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize