He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
