I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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