Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
