Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Because it was 5am and I had a shitty mixed drink and I was threatening to put my balls in your face.
Not the worst first impression I've experienced.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
