We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Randomize