if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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