Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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