I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
