Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize