I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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