i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
