Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
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