She's JV to your varsity
We got so high we made milksteak
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
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