It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
